


I deserved it

by Snugglebearbell



Category: The 100
Genre: 100, 100AU, Bellarke, Caring Clarke, Hurt Bellamy, Mild cussing?, Multi, PTSD, Panic Attacks, Past Rape/Non-con, Protective Clarke, Protective Octavia, Rape Aftermath, Rape Recovery, Sad Bellamy, jasper is adorable, the100 - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-30
Updated: 2018-05-20
Packaged: 2018-07-19 03:21:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con, Underage
Chapters: 7
Words: 9,946
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7342594
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Snugglebearbell/pseuds/Snugglebearbell
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Bellamy, Jasper, monty and two guards are out on a mission to capture a tribe of rapest when something goes wrong that makes Bellamy face something he thought he burried long ago. Aha I suck at Summaries. I don't even think I spelt that right. Oh well. Read this anyone please cause you might enjoy it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first 100 fanfic so it sucks. Also this is graphic so be careful look at the tags and don't read it the topic of rape bothers you. Uh, also I apologize for the amount of sad Bellamy that is in this very short chapter. Oh and if you notice that I forgot a tag or whatever please tell me because I've never used this site before.

They had been looking for the dihanie tribe, pack of men, who's smallest soldier is larger than Bellamy, men who forced themselves on anyone and anything they could get they're hands on when they noticed that Bellamy wasn't his usual, "take the lead" self. he was the one dragging behind everyone else, he was distant, couldn't look anyone in the eye, could barely get a sentence out without his voice breaking a little, Jasper was the one who took notice first, whispering something to Monty, who then turned around to look at bell. 

 

A Considered look crossed his face before turned back around and whispered something back to Jasper that Bellamy just couldn't make out. It wasn't long till the guards took notice as well, listening to Monty and Jaspers whispers, then everyone was whispering their opinions to each other some were saying he was just tired but others who knew Bellamy, who knew how far he pushed himself before knew it wasn't just sleep deprivation. But they all ignored it and kept hiking. They couldn't lose anymore daylight. 

 

It wasn't till, Monty's gun slipped through his sweating fingers and hit the ground that even the guards realized Bellamy was in worse shape than they thought. As soon as the gun hit the ground with a loud thud Bellamy hit the ground as well, backing himself against a tree. He placed his index finger on the trigger but didn't pull it, his eyes shut tightly and he was whispering quite- meaningless sentences. 

They were so close to the Dihanie tribe, they couldn't let Bellamy draw attention to them, not now. Not when they were so close to catching the monsters. 

 

"Shut him up!" Anthony, a guard half yelled half- Whispered. 

 

Jasper nodded, Stepping towards a trembling Bellamy. 

"Bellamy, look- just calm down, please. You can't be loud." 

"We, I- I can't do this I can't! I can't do this!!" 

"Anthony! Shut him up before he gets us all killed!!" Alek another guard bellowed 

"What- what can't you do?" 

"I can't- please don't make me." 

"Bellamy shhh, you're screaming. Calm down." 

"That's it!" Anthony walked over, grabbing Bellamy but he head of his hair, dragging him towards the top of the hill where they could see where the dihanie tribe had set up camp, "— If he wants to draw attention towards us he can be the distraction.." 

 

"What're you doing? Something's wrong with him, he can't go down there!" 

 

"Please, please don't please.. I can't- I-I- c—" Bellamy was cut off but a hard tug of his collar, Anthony threw him down the hill. 

 

Bellamy went tumbling down the hill, face smashing against tree roots and rocks. When his head hit the third rock he couldn't keep his hand on his gun, he let go and quickly used his arms to shield his face. Not that it'd do much good he was now at the bottom of the hill. 

His vision was blurry and his arms and legs wouldn't work like he wanted them to, he couldn't feel anything till someone, not so accidentally stepped on his hand. 

 

"Now. What do we have here?-" sovak one of the Dihanie tribe, asked. Twisting bells arm around and putting Bellamy In a headlock. 

 

Marc, another one of the Dihanie soldiers stepped forward. Running his thumb over Bellamy's cheek, "Looks like a sky boy." 

 

"And a good looking one at that. He might be of use." Kerk added, Kerk was the smallest of all the tribe but over all the deadliest. 

 

Bellamy struggled in the over sized soldiers grasp "I'm not working for you." He spat. 

 

"You thought we wanted you to work? No. I thought you might look nice thrown over a table with me inside you." Marc replied.

 

"No! Let go of me!" 

 

"I wonder how you'd look jerking me off while while Sovak was on top of you." Kerk said 

"No, no. Sovak had his fun earlier. It's my turn." Marc said stepping even closer to Bellamy. "You see, Sky boy. I have a problem that needs fixing. Do you mind helping?" 

 

"I'm not helping you with anything you sick bastard!" 

Marc laughed dryly before taking bell by the collar and pushing him against a nearby tree and pressing a knife to bellamys neck. Bellamy knew what the sick mans 'problem' was as soon as Marc's growing bulge was against his thigh, "no I think you will, because I'm the one pressing the knife to your neck. First time you disobey I press down and bye bye sky boy." 

 

"let me go!" 

 

"Oh, I have a better idea. Why don't you and I go to my tent." with Marc's breath hot against his cheek Bellamy struggled trying to break free of the Dihanies tight grip. "Ok-ok. I'm not shy. We can do it right here, in front of everyone if that's how you like it" Bellamy closed his eyes tightly and shook his head, "Take off your pants" Bellamy shook his head again and this time the knife was pressed harder against his neck, drawing blood but lucky not causing too much damage, "I said; take off your pants." 

Bellamy thought about calling out to Jasper or Monty he knew they'd here him, hell they should see him right now but he also knew he couldn't call them because if he did he'd be letting all of the Dihanie tribe know of their location so he stood there undoing his belt and silently swearing at himself for it. He heard the man behind him fiddling with his belt, then he heard them fall to the mans ankle.

"Get on your hands and knees"

 

"No, no, no. Please I'll do anything else please don't make me" 

"Get on your hands in knees now!" Bellamy did as he was told even though his whole body was telling him to fight, even though he knew he might have a chance to get away he did as he was told even though he was afraid of what was about to happen. He did what he was told because he was even more scared of dying, he couldn't leave Octiava, he couldn't leave all those kids that looked to him, and he currently couldn't leave Clarke. 

The Marc bit at Bellamy's earlobe as wrapped a hand around Bellamy's chest, he plunged himself into Bellamy wordlessly, pulling out and pushing back in over and over. 

 

Bellamy began to sweat and cry, he used his hands to try and grip something because he thought, maybe just maybe if he had something to hold onto it wouldn't hurt as bad. It wasn't long before Bellamy couldn't keep quite anymore 

"Jasper!!! Monty!! Please, please! Somebody please...Jasper help me!!" 

 

Marc pulled out without saying a word earning a groan of pain from Bellamy

"What the hell are you talking about sky boy! Who came here with you? Did you bring sky soldiers with you? get ready to attack now!" before they could attack Jasper starting shooting, hitting Marc in the throat. Bellamy wasted no time in trying to get away, he couldn't quite walk but after a minute he managed to pull his pants up around his waist. He ran as fast as his unsteady legs would carry him. Someone grabbed his shoulder, Bellamy grabbed the hand and twisted it till he heard someone cry out, he knew the voice but he couldn't stop to think about who it belonged to, instead he ran until his legs gave way he cursed himself under his breath, as soon as his arms stopped shaking he starting crawling away when someone grabbed his ankle, he started kicking and screaming, trying to get loose. Whoever had him quickly let go when Bellamy's foot collided with his face "Bellamy! Bellamy!! Calm down it's just me. It's Jasper." 

 

He looked up at Jasper, his eyes lite up till he noticed that Jaspers nose was bleeding. His face changed from utter happiness to regret. "Oh god, Jasper— I'm sorry. I didn't know.." 

 

"Relax, it's not your fault. I'm not mad, though Monty seems kinda pissed that you broke his hand." Again Bellamy's face twisted in regret, Jasper noticed and placed a hand on Bellamy's shoulder. "I'm kidding, Monty isn't not mad. We both tried to get to you when..uh when it.. Was happening but Anthony wouldn't let us." 

Jasper helped Bellamy back to his feet, and handed him his gun. "You dropped this– uh, I think they're all dead, except for the leader. Alek is gonna take him to Lexa." Bellamy nodded and took the gun placing his finger on the trigger. 

 

"Sky boy!" Kerk yelled, the words echoed and Bellamy stiffened and started shooting towards to sound of the words shooting not only Kerk but Alek too

 

"Bellamy, you idiot!!" 

 

"I- I didn't.. I didn't see him. I- I I didn't." 

 

"Bellamy, shh. It's okay we all saw. I know you didn't mean to. Just calm down." Jasper whispered. 

"No no it's not okay! It's not okay he killed my brother! He's a traitor!" 

Bellamy started shaking and he couldn't breath. His vision started blurring, his knees hit the ground and the last thing he sees before he blacks out is Jasper in front of him.

They argued about leaving Bellamy but Anthony was out voted two to one so they started back to camp with Bellamy on a makeshift cot


	2. Till I wake up

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like I said before this is my first 100 fanfic and my first time using this site so I apologize for the stupidity of this story. Uh this chapter is all over the place and it's horrid. It also goes off in a weird spot but again, you are warned. Please leave comments if you like this or whatever. I also apologize for typos this story has been in my notes forever.

Kane stood tall, his hand swept through his hair as he let out a deep sigh. He didn't see this coming, he really didn't. He had no idea that his best soldier, Bellamy Blake would be carried in barely awake and screaming. And he definitely didn't expect him to be accused of murder. 

"Take him to a cell, now! I don't want to see his face." Anthony screamed as he walked past Monty, and a shaking Bellamy. 

"What's going on here!?" Kane demanded an answer. 

"He killed my brother. He shot him. He shot him in the head. He's a murderer and he deserves to be punished. I demand it!" 

 

"That's not true! It wasn't his fault and you know th—" 

"shut up Jordan, your commanding officer is talking."

Jasper took four steps forward so he was now inches from Anthony's face, he pushed his supposed commanders shoulders back, looking him in the eye.  
"No, my commanding officer is being stuffed in a jail cell and getting wrongly accused of murder." 

 

"Don't question my authority! I'm a lead member of the guard. You're a criminal." 

 

"I've been pardoned of my crimes. Doesn't seem you were ever actually charged for yours." 

In Jaspers mind this was stand off. Anthony was making Bellamy less of a hero, more of a coward. He was calling his brother, his (and pretty much everyone else's) protector weak and hell would freeze over before Jasper let that go with out at least a correction. But Jaspers standoff was cut short when his attention was taken away from Anthony and placed back on Bellamy. 

"Please don't. I can't go back into a cage not again-- please not again. I can't please. Clarke!! Oh god, please no. Jasper!!" 

"Jasper, looks like your commander needs you, I'll handle this, you go look after Bellamy. Make sure he's okay- don't let them put the chains on his wrist, I'll be there soon to straighten things out. And maybe find Clarke or Octavia. Both would be nice." 

Jasper gave Kane a nod and half small then went on his way to Bellamy

 

"Straighten things out!? No, he killed my brother and injured two of your people. He deserves to be punished. —If we were on the ark he'd be floated!" 

 

"But we're not on the ark and he won't be floated." 

 

"He's over the age of 18! It's the law." 

 

"Not down here. He will not be put to death." 

 

"If you won't kill him then punish him. My brother is dead. I deserve justice." 

 

"I won't do it." 

 

"Let's see what the people say. Let's see if they want the rules bent for someone who shot Jaha!" 

 

"Yeah, let's see because that someone also kept their kids alive." 

 

"Half of those kids are orphans. Nobody cares about them being alive. They care about laws. Let's go. Let's go right now and see what the people want" 

 

Kane shook his head in disapproval yet followed anyway, Kane watched as Anthony stood up on a log in the middle of camp, cupped his hands around his mouth and started shouting at the people

"Bellamy Blake! The man who shot Jaha, the man who killed those helpless women and children on mount weather, Bellamy Blake the murder killed my brother today. And Our leaders want him to go unpunished! He's a cold blooded killer and I say he deserves punishment!! Who's with me?!" 

 

"Hell yeah!!" The crowed screamed 

 

"He's gone unpunished for far too long!! It's time that he got what he deserved." 

 

Kane watched as people yelled and screamed, he watched as the people he thought came so far leapt at the chance to punish someone, he watched as Clarke made her way through the crowd. And He'd be lying if he said he didn't wanna run for the hills because Clarke Griffen had her 'I'm pissed as hell and I'll slit throats' face on and he frankly was scared Shitless. 

 

"What the hells going on? Where's Bellamy?" 

 

"In a cell." 

"In a what? You put him in a cell? After mount weather? After the shit they did to him!?! After they locked him in a damn caged!" 

"I- uh- I was told he killed a guard" yes, Kane was scared, very scared. 

"Jasper and Monty were with him, why didn't you ask them what has happened?" 

Kane was about to explain to Clarke that he wasn't totally incompetent but he was interrupted by Monty. 

"Clarke! It's Bellamy- he's, he's been asking for you and I'm pretty sure you need to look him over." 

 

_  
_

 

When Clarke got there Octavia was already there, Jasper by her side as she was trying to get to her brother, begging the guards to let her in with him. 

 

"Ms Blake. You're not allowed in with the prisoners." 

"Cut the bull and let me in. I'm his sister. You know me -you know him. He's scared, please, please let me in.. " 

"Octavia, I'm sorry I can't." 

"Lincoln is going to kick your as—" 

"Octavia.." Clarke spoke up. Getting the youngest Blakes attention. 

"Clarke, oh my god. He won't let me in. You know how scared me must be. Clarke we have to get in there." 

 

"Jack, let us in. You know Kane would allow it. And you kinda owe me and Bellamy for saving your life." It's true, Jack definitely owed Clarke. A few weeks before Jack, Bellamy and a few others were out hunting when Jack got hurt. he had slipped and fell on his own knife, he was clumsy as a hell and nobody could believe he was actually a guard. Bellamy carried him back to camp and then Clarke patched up the wound on his side and he was fine. But if it had it not been for Bellamy he would've bleed out in the woods. 

 

"Clarke– I could get in trouble." 

 

"You'd be dead if it weren't for Bellamy. Now let us in." 

_  
_

Bellamy was in the corner facing the wall, his arms were wrapped around his knees as he rocked back in forth. Octiava stopped in her tracks, suddenly not sure if she actually wants to see her brother like this, but Jasper puts a hand on her shoulder and gives her a small- sad smile and that was enough. She knew her brother needed her so she walked closer to him.

 

"Hey, big brother.."

Bellamy turned around when he heard Octavia. Clarke let out a small gasp when she saw that his face was coated in blood and dirt. She also couldn't help but notice the cut on his neck along with the dried trail of blood that lead away from it. But she stood there and let the Blake siblings have their moment together. 

 

Octavia wasted no time in getting to her brother, she knelt on the floor in front of him and wrapped her arms around her brother, and he wrapped his around her.  
She ran her hand over his back and told him that it was okay, she honestly expected him to stay quiet because normally that's what Bellamy did. He stayed quiet and destroyed himself from the inside. But this time he didn't stay quiet, he couldn't keep the cries in like he wanted to but he was secretly grateful for that. "They— he kept, he made me. Octavia be made me. Just like before, 'tavia I can't do it again.." 

 

"Shh, it's okay big brother. I won't let anything happen to you. Ever." 

 

Octavia's watery eyes met Bellamy's tired eyes only for a second till he jerked his head to the side, not wanting his little sister to see him act like such a scared child. 

 

Clarke knew Bellamy was in good hands with Octavia so she took Jasper by the arm and lead him outside the cell, "what was he taking about Jasper? What'd they do to him?"

 

"Clarke.. I don't know if..."

 

"Jasper please. I need to know.." 

"They..uh, well one.. Marc, he- he raped him."

"Jasper that's not funny. Bellamy would've protected himself– he wouldn't.."

 

"He couldn't. That's whats so freaking sick about it. They're all huge, even their smallest was bigger than Bellamy he just made Bellamy."

 

"How, who's.. How do.." 

 

"He did it in front of everyone, he had a knife to Bellamy's throat and he made him take his pants off and then he-he made him get on his knees then..he, uh you know."

 

"You all watched and didn't help him?"

 

"Clarke I tried! Monty and I both tried to get to him but Anthony wouldn't let us go. Not until it was necessary."

 

"When was it necessary?!" 

 

"When he started screaming for me and Monty." 

 

"Oh, God. Why, why.. Why was he down there by himself? Why'd you guys let him go by himself?" 

 

"Clarke! I didn't have a choice. I tried to help him. Bellamy started freaking out, he was screaming and he couldn't breath. Alak and Anthony said he was making too much noise, so Anthony threw him down the hill, he used Bellamy as a distraction." 

 

"Then he let Bellamy get raped." raped, the word echoed over and over in Clarke's mind before it finally clicked, "oh my god, Bellamy was raped. My–Our Bellamy.. He was.. Oh God." 

 

Jasper caught it, he heard her slip in the 'my' but he didn't call her on it. Instead he wrapped his arms around her and let her cry her silent tears, he'd be strong right now because he knew that he'd need to cry later. He didn't know exactly why he'd cry when he wasn't the one it was done to but he doesn't really care about a reason right now.

 

"hey, wipe your eyes. You need to go in there and help Bellamy." 

 

"Jasper I can't, see him knowing what happened- I can't give him some medicine and make this go away.." 

 

"Yes you can, in a way. jusy be there with him. Let him know you’re there. now in there and work your Clarke magic on him. Check out his shoulder too, he kept holding it earlier. And his leg was bleeding, his side too I think. Monty knows more about Bellamy's injures he tried to look him over before we brought him back but that didn't happen.

 

"I sent Monty to my mother. I wanted him to get checked out. You need to be checked out too." 

 

"No, no. I'm not leaving." 

 

"Okay. Well Let me see your nose" Jasper stepped towards Clarke and let her tell him what to do, "other than the obvious broken nose you're fine, few bruises thats it." 

 

"Thanks, Clarke. Now go check on Bellamy." 

 

 

That's what she did, she went back into the cell and saw Bellamy and Octavia in the same position they were in when she left but this time Bellamy saw her, and she swear she saw his eyes light up a little. 

"Hey, princess.."

"Hey bell," she walked over and sat down next to Octavia, using her middle and index finger to push up his chin, "lemme see." She ran her thumb over the cut on his neck, it was long but not deep, "it doesn't need stitches. none of the cuts in your face need stitches, they just need to be cleaned. Octavia, could you go get my mom? she'll know what to bring." 

 

Octavia kissed her brothers head, and went to get abby, "I'll be right back." 

 

"I need to see the wound on your side and the one on your leg." But Bellamy shook his head and backed himself even further into the corner. "C'mon Bellamy, it's okay." Clarke reached out to touch his shoulder but he flinched back. "Bellamy you know I'm not gonna hurt you. Let me help you." 

 

"I want 'O" 

 

"She'll be right back Bellamy. Can you at least let me see your shoulder?" 

Bellamy nodded and scooted towards Clarke, she tried to get a good look at it without asking him to take his shirt off but there wasn't much use in that. 

"Bell, can you take your shirt off. I can't get a good look at your shoulder and I need to get a good look at your thigh too, we can't let it get infected." 

"I- I" 

"It's not like I haven't seen your chest before, You used to jump at the chance to walk around camp with your clothes off." 

"Clarke.."

 

"Nobody will be looking. It's just you and me." 

"You're just gonna check my leg?"

 

"Of course." 

 

Bellamy hesitantly got undressed and Clarke couldn't deny the fact she was staring. It would've been a little weird to see Bellamy in his underwear in general before but now knowing what happened to him earlier made this the most awkward situation she's ever been in. She ignored it though and checked his shoulder then his thigh, his shoulder was just bruised but his thigh was a different story. By the looks of it he must have fallen on top of a sharpe rock when he was thrown down that hill. 

"You're shoulder looks okay but your gonna need stitches on your thigh."

 

Bellamy didn't seem to hear her or maybe the words didn't click in his head but whatever it was it didn't matter because all he wanted was to get his clothes back on. 

 

"Can I— can I put.."

"Yeah, of course. I'll need to clean and stitch it up later though." 

 

"Okay. I'd just really like to lay down now."

 

"You want me to stay here till you fall asleep?" 

 

"Till I wake up." 

 

"Even better."


	3. It's urgent

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just read it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is horrible and short I'm sorry. If you have any ideas about the next chapter please let me here them. Oh and If you see any typos please let me know.

When Bellamy woke up he was happily surprised that Clarke stayed. But she wasn't sitting next to him anymore, she was over by the door talking with Octavia and Kane.

 

"I'm not gonna talk about this in front of him, we can go outside and talk in a while but right now my main concern is Bellamy. Then I wanna hang this Anthony guy up by his balls and then.. Well I don't know what I'm going to do with him once I actually hang him up but it will definitely have something to do with cutting his balls off"  
Clarke was whispering but Bellamy could still here her, because when his princess is upset she isn't that quiet. 

"he deserves more than that for what he let that jackass do to Bellamy." Octavia scoffed 

 

"What did he let happen? What happened to Bellamy?" 

 

"Like Clarke said, we're not talking about that in front of him." 

 

"Clarke.." Bellamy's voice was small and horse, but still his and it made Clarke walk over as fast as she could. 

 

"Hey, Bell. You're finally awake.." 

 

"I don't want him here, Clarke. Please make him leave."

 

"Why?" 

 

"Just please make him leave." 

 

"Okay, he's good as gone." Clarke smiled and gave a not so subtle wave to Octavia, letting her know Kane had to go.

 

"Alright, out now!" 

 

"I have to talk to him, I have to explain something to him!" 

 

"No. You need to leave." 

 

"But it's urgent"

"You're the one who hasn't done anything about getting Bellamy out of here! My brother doesn't want you here, now go."

Kane left shaking his head, Octavia sat with Clarke, while she combed Bellamy's curly locks from his forehead. 

 

"Maybe you should eat something as far as I know you haven't had anything since you left the other day."

 

"I'm not hungry.."

 

"There's no way you're not hungry, Cmon.. Please." 

 

Jasper, Kane, Anthony and four guards came through the door. Grabbing Bellamy. 

 

"I'm sorry Bellamy I tried to stop them!" Jasper yelled trying to push past Kane and get to Bellamy. 

Clarke grabbed the back Anthony's shirt  
"What the hell are you doing! Let go of him!" Anthony turned around and took Clarke's hand off of his shirt "how about you let go of me instead." 

 

"No you jackass! This is your own fault! You did this to Bellamy, you got your brother killed not him!" Anthony pushed Clarke forward, she stumbled but didn't hit the ground. They started dragging Bellamy out of his cell, kicking and screaming. Then Octavia followed along with the guards 

"He wasn't in his right mind! He begged you not to send him but you didn't listen, he told me what you said, you can't place the blame on him. This isn't his fault!" 

 

Kane stepped in front of Octavia, stopping the younger Blake from following the guards any further, he placed his hand on Octavia's shoulder. "He killed one of our guards and Injured two of our people, two of your friends Octavia, wither it be my fault or not the act can't go unpunished." Octavia looked at him with such betrayal that Kane felt like he was the one dragging Bellamy off. 

 

Kane hated this just as much if not more than Octavia, he knows he was wrong. Bellamy begged and begged not to go, but as always Kane was stubborn. 

_

||. this is a flashback,  
I just wanted to make that clear ||

 

'Kane, please. I can't do this...you told me I could come to you and- and These men, the things they do- I Can't be around someone like that- I can't think about the things they've done.' 

 

'Bellamy, you're one of our best soldiers. You can't be here resting while the other soldiers are off fighting these criminals, Lexa said if we brought these men to justice there could be talk of peace. Are you really gonna stand in the way of that?" 

 

"I can't, Kane please. I can't all those men they- the leader.. He looks like Targ"

 

"What does it matter if the leader of this.. This criminal gang looks Like an ex ark guard? I would think that since he was one of the men who dragged your mother off to be floated you'd be happy to kill someone who looked like him." Bellamy flinched at the mention of his mother, but he nodded towards his new commander. 

 

"Just, listen to me. Please they prey on the defenseless-" 

 

"And that should be all the more reason why you should want you take them down." 

 

"But—" 

 

"If this is about what happened with Targ and your mother on the Ark.." 

 

"How do you know about that?" 

 

"Please, everyone knew about your mother and him, and the other men. She was the Ark whore. Guards would stumbling into the break room talking about her." 

Kane watched as Bellamy's face twisted from fear to hatred and suddenly everything sitting on His makeshift desk was sent flying across the room. 

 

"Fuck you!" Bellamy spat 

 

"I'd just have your mother do it, if she weren't floating across the—." Kane didn't bother finishing his sentence after the door was slammed


	4. I'll be good

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Just read it

Abby was there now, trying to get though to Kane, as the guards tied Bellamy to the posts. 

 

"Please, Kane. He's a child"

 

"You had to be shocked, Abby, I can't hold one person accountable and not another. And he's not a child, he's an adult" 

 

"He's a child. We sent him, along with my daughter and Jaha's son down here because we were cowards. We made them grow too quickly." 

 

"Kane, please! Hear the rest of the story."

 

They tightened Bellamy's restraints, "please, stop, please.." 

Octavia watched as her brother whimpered and pleaded for the men to let him go, when she looked into her brothers eyes, those eyes belonged to someone who would die for her, not someone who should he punished for suffering. She took a deep breath, and took the small knife she had hidden in her belt, placing it to the guard who was closest to Bellamy, Josh, was his name. "Let my brother go. Let him go or I'll slit this idiots throat!" Another guard stepped forward, gun in hand, Octavia placed Josh in a headlock, and pointed the knife towards the guard.

 

"Octavia, stop" Bellamy's voice broke her frantic thoughts, she looked at her brother in confusion. 

 

"I won't let them hurt you, bell." 

 

"It's okay, 'O" 

 

"No! It's not, it's not okay! They don't get to punish you for this!" 

 

"And I won't let you get hurt because of me, go." 

 

"Bell.."

 

"You're my responsibility," Octavia tried to ignore the way his voice broke, "and you're mine!" She replied 

 

"Go stand with Clarke, now Octavia.. Please." 

 

Octavia gave her brother a nod and slowly let go of Josh, dropping the knife as she walked towards Clarke.

 

"Kane! Let us explain." Clarke screamed, but Kane didn't listen, instead he walked behind Bellamy,

 

"Twenty Shock lashes, will be given as punishment for the death of our people." 

Abby stepped forward, placing a hand on James shoulder, "He can't handle that, we don't have to live that way anymore!! We can be better, please don't do this to him."

 

"Laws are laws, Abby. I can't lead without making difficult decisions." Kane looked toward a guard, "get them out of here, the sister too." 

 

"No, no!!"

 

Clarke, Abby and Octavia were dragged to the back of the crowd, held back and made to watched as Kane spoke one word that could inflict so much hurt to a person "Begin"

 

The first two lashes were okay, they hurt but they Bellamy didn't scream, well, not until the lashes become longer, and longer his screams, echoed throughout the entire camp. 

Soon Monty and Jasper were beside Clarke, watching as their 'rebel kings' pain was displayed to everyone. 

When the eighth lash was given Bellamy's legs gave way and he was only being held up but his tightly bound wrists. Clarke's , shoulder tensed, as Bellamy's screams became louder, "please stop..I'm sorry! I didn't mean to- I thought he was—gahhhh"

 

When they finally let Bellamy catch his breath you could see the way his muscles, flexed finally getting a break, as he took in a deep breath you could see the way he flinched. 

 

Nine, ten, eleven, twelve, thirteen, fourteen, fifth-teen the lashes were all long and Bellamy's screams were the same, he passed out for a few minutes when the fourteenth lash was given and Clarke was grateful because even if it was just for a second his body could rest, Anthony stepped forward again, to give the sixteenth lash, "please. I'll do better please! I'll be good.." 

Clarke and Octavia had been struggling in the guards grip since they had been grabbed but it wasn't any use, finally Jaspers eyes met Clarke's and her eyes told him everything, he whispered in Monty's ear then they both attacked the guards, knocking them to ground before they ran towards Bellamy, who was passed out again. 

 

"You're punishing Bellamy for something that's not even his fault! Anthony, the one giving Bellamy shock lashes is the one who should be strung up! He threw Bellamy down the hill as a distraction! Then watched as he was.. He watched as a member of the Dihanie tribe raped Bellamy.. I tried- Monty and I both tried to get to him, but Anthony said it wasn't necessary. Bellamy was scared, he didn't mean to shoot Alec, he was aiming for a Dihanie soldier. It wasn't his fault. Anthony is the one who should be punished! You trust this man to watch over us, but as soon as things got difficult he threw one of our people under the bus. He willingly set back as Bellamy, the man who kept your kids alive, who kept you alive, was violated and humiliated and now he's putting Bellamy through that again. He's the one who deserves to be punished, not Bellamy but if you're gonna punish Bellamy. You'll have to punish me too and while your at it you might as well punish Monty, Clarke, Octavia and Lincoln. We all had part in mount weather where people were killed. Yet you still go to Clarke when you're hurt or sick, you drink Monty's moonshine, you come to me when you need something shot. Lincoln and Octavia makes you all feel safe even if you don't like to admit it. And Bellamy always puts his people before himself! He's a leader and a hero and you all know that! I thought our people were better than this, I didn't think our people would jump at the chance to see bleed shed, but I was wrong. God was I wrong." 

 

When Jaspers speech was over the crowd had grew quite. heads turned towards Antony who stood over Bellamy, he looked at Bellamy one more time before placing the lash stick to Bellamy's skin again, leaving it there till Kane tackled him to the ground. Antony wiggled out of Kane's grip and ran off. Jasper, Monty, Harper, Murphy , Kane and most of the guards ran after him. 

 

Clarke, Octavia and Lincoln went over to Bellamy, Lincoln picked Bellamy's lifeless body up in his arms while Octavia and Clarke cut his restrains. "Get him to the med bay now!" Lincoln didn't need to be told that Bellamy needed medical attention, if was pretty obvious. But he didn't say anything, instead he ran towards the med bay with Bellamy in his arms. 

You wouldn't think Lincoln was such a lethal person by the way he set Bellamy down on cot, he was so gently and caring. It made Octavia's heart swell watching the man she loved taking care of her brother. Clarke checked Bellamy's ribs. then his wrists, Octavia was there holding her brothers clammy hand. "His right wrist is broken. Four of his ribs are broken and two more are bruised. And the burns- well they're pretty obvious and his breathing is uneven."

Clarke grabbed a wet cloth and started cleaning Bellamy's wrist, then he starting convulsing. His body twitched and liquid dripped from his mouth. "Lincoln go get my mom, Octavia help me roll him on his side so he doesn't choke." 

"Why is he seizing!" 

 

"I don't know.. Seizures are neurological, maybe one of the lashed hit a certain nerve that lead to his brain.." Soon the older Blake's seizure stopped and the rolled him back into his earlier position.

"Is he gonna be okay?"

 

"His heart rate is way too high, we need to get it down. Other than that I think he may just need rest." 

"What about the seizure? Is that gonna happen again." 

 

"It may not even be a seizure. Sometimes it's the way your body handles the shock. I don't what it means if it happens again, but my mom probably does. When she gets here we'll ask her. I think right now though we just need to watch him, let him get some rest." 

 

Clarke and Octavia sat beside Bellamy, Lincoln was there too, standing close to Octavia. Clarke ran her hand through Bellamy's hair for what seemed like forever and Octavia held his hand, both impatiently waiting for him to wake up. 

 

Soon Monty came in, tapping Clarke on the shoulder, "Clarke. We need you out here" 

 

"No. Im staying right here, I'm not leaving him again. 

 

"Kane wants you and Octavia to decide what happens to Anthony." 

 

"Well, since it's my brother, I say death by a thousand cuts." Octavia said, taking over for Clarke and her hand though Bellamy's hair. 

 

"I don't think that's enough."

 

"Clarke. Cmon. Kane really wants to see you." 

 

Clarke ran her hand over Bellamy's shoulder, whispered something in his here then went over to Monty "Fine. Let's go"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I apologize for this sucky-ness it this chapter. I didn't some research on the aftermath of electric shock so I tried to make it as real as possible. If you have any idea on what should be one to Antony please tell me. Also tell me if you like this story and if I should continue it.


	5. Stubborn

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This sucks and I thought I uploaded it sooner but apparently not. Uh, I don't really know if I'll be continuing this story or not. My writing is horrible and I can't really think of what to do next.

Kane was somewhat of a short tempered man, sure he has patients with some people but that doesn't change the fact that he angers too easily and right now as sat in his makeshift office letting the day replay in his head again and again he only angered himself further. The morning was the most repeated scene. Bellamy Blake, the so called 'rebel King' begging him to let him stay in camp. He wished he would've let him stay, but part of him doesn't think the Dihanie tribe would actually be dead right now, it was pretty clear that Bellamy was a big part of actually taking them down, But maybe Bellamy wouldn't be so.. Hurt right now, he wouldn't have been raped, but was he even raped? No he couldn't have been this is Bellamy he's thinking about. It had to be a lie, something desperate Jasper spit out in hopes of stopping Bellamy's lashings. It was a lie, it had to be a lie right? Men can't be raped. And there was no way that Bellamy Blake would sit there and let someone rape him. 

 

Clarke stood in the doorway watching while Kane ran his hands though his hair as he sighed, slightly annoyed. 

 

"Commander Kane, you asked to speak to me" Clarke's tone matched the look on her face, pissed off. 

 

"I did. Since I can go ahead and assume you'll be taking the lead on Bellamy's medical treatment I thought I'd ask you when I could speak to him." 

 

"I thought this was about deciding what to do about Anthony? And Why would you want to speak to him?" 

 

"Because I need to get his side of the story, so I can confirm." Kane answered ignoring her question about Anthony. 

"Jasper, Monty and Anthony confirming isn't enough? You have to torture him again? You're such an ass! Do you realize how much Trauma you put his body through? Do you honestly think he'll be okay enough to talk to you about that?" 

 

"I think you should Watch your tone Ms Griffin." 

 

"No! I don't need to watch anything. You need to get off your pathetic ass and do something about the idiot hanging by his arms in the middle of camp. I'm going to Check on Bellamy if you decide you would like to apologize to him you'll be allowed inside." Clarke snapped 

 

"Allowed?" Kane stood up as if testing her words. 

 

"You said it yourself I'm taking lead on his case."

 

_

As Clarke walked back into the medbay you could say she was little more then shocked when she saw Bellamy trying to stand up, not that she should be Bellamy's always been stubborn, speaking of stubborn where the hell is Octavia? She's suppose to be watching him "hey! No, you had a seizure you need to rest." 

 

"No I can't stay, I need to get up— I need to get out of here. I can't be in here I can't he's here.. I - L-let me go.." Bellamy tried, and failed to push Clarke away as she gently pushed him back into the bed, if you could call it that. "No. I— I need-" 

"Bellamy stop! You need to lay still. Calm down you're okay, everything is okay." 

 

"No- no no I— no" Bellamy continued to gasp for air as he tried to talk.

 

"Bellamy breathe!" I can't "Bellamy just calm down and breath" he wanted to scream at Clarke, he wanted to let her know that he was trying, he wanted to tell her it just wasn't that easy. 

"Hey, take a deep breath." 

 

"I– I ca– can't", Bellamy gasped. Clarke sat down across from Bellamy on the cold table He was using as a bed and placed her hands on either side if his face. "Yes you can. Close your eyes and take a deep breathe" he raised an eyebrow at her questioningly. He doesn't understand Why would closing his eyes help but he does so anyway. "Okay good. That's good Bellamy. Now think of something happy-" Bellamy opened his and gasped again, giving her an annoyed look. "Aw cmon bell think of something happy- something with Octavia. Before everything went to hell." 

 

He closed his eyes again and she smiled, "you got it?" She asked, he nodded. "Where are you at?"

It took a second, and his breath was still uneven but it was defiantly an improvement. "On the Ark, in our quarters. Mom, t-tavia and me." 

 

"That's nice. What're you doing?" 

 

Bellamy forced a laugh through the tears that he didn't notice he let slip and finally replied, "we were reading about Ancient Rome. About the first Roman emperor, Augustus and his sister- do- do you know what his sisters name was?" 

"I can't say that I do." 

 

"Octavia. Her name was Octavia. That's where I got her name" 

"- wait, where you got her name?" Clarke Asked, suddenly realizing she still had her hands on his cheeks, she quickly moved them from his cheek and took his hand in hers instead. "My mom let me name her, I think that's why I feel so protective over her, I got to name her. She was mine, the first thing that was ever just mine. Everything else I'd ever had- I had to share. My mom- she was always with guys - day and night I never had her to myself. My clothes, they were always hand-me downs. I had to share everything and then all of a sudden I have my own little person to take care of. No one knew about her, my mom wouldn't have time she was busy with 'work' so Octavia was mine. My sister my responsibility." 

Clarke smiled at Bellamy's little rant about his sister then grabbed a cup of water that was sitting near Bellamy's - bed, smirking. 

 

"What?" He asked sitting up as much as he could to get a drink, "you do realize that you stopped freaking out. Right?" She asked. Bellamy didn't reply, he simply sighed and laid back down. 

 

"Thanks, Princess." He mumbled- 

 

"Get some rest, Bellamy" she said pulling a blanket over him. 

 

"I've been sleeping all day Clarke," Clarke smiled at him again, "you need rest Bellamy, go back to sleep I'm too tired to sit here and watch you all night" 

 

"All night?" He asks 

 

"It's eleven at night, Bell. you haven't been sleeping that long. It's only been a few hours since everything happened, now be still and go to sleep because when the pain medication finally does wear off you won't be able to even think. Goodnight Bellamy" 

 

"Goodnight, Princess." He said closing his eyes.


	6. Child o' mine

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Oh just read it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Fair warning there is smut/ my first attempt at it too- in this chapter. Please let me know if you found it unfitting to the story and I will remove it. I did want to show other people, such as Octavia go through this as well so that is why this chapter is focused on her(mostly) don't worry though Bellamy is still in this chapter and he and Clarke have a little moment. Oh and all rights go to guns n' roses for their song "child o' 'mine" again please tell me if the smut is horrible or shouldn't be in here. Also tell me what you think if the chapter

"Octavia, stop pacing." 

 

"Pacing is what you do when you're nervous. I'm nervous" 

 

"Bellamy will be fine- he's warrior. He's survived Mount weather, which I won't say is worse than what he's going through but he has proved that he's strong. He'll be okay.." 

 

"Lincoln its my job to worry about him. He's always looked out for me. Always- and after Pike, after thought they were gonna hurt you- after I told him he was dead to me he was still there for me. He made sure I was okay, and now he's hurting again and I can't do anything about it. Just like before. I'm his sister and I couldn't protect him—" Lincoln walked over to Octavia and took her hands in his, shushing her, "Octavia, stop. Let's go for a walk, okay? it'd calm you down and then maybe would could get some sleep."  
Octavia ran her thumbs over his hands and bit her lip. "I can't go for a walk- it's eleven o'clock and I can't leave what if something happens. What if...." 

 

"Octavia stop with the 'what ifs' everything will be okay. Just come with me and we will be back in a few hours, then we'll go to sleep and be with Bellamy before he even wakes up." 

 

"I don't know.." 

 

"Come on, lets go chase butterflies." 

 

"Lincoln, I don't do that anymore... I wish Clarke never even told you about that." 

 

"I think it's adorable."

 

"I'm not so adorable when I'm kicking ass and taking names like a warrior princess." 

 

"I find that adorable too. Now, Cmon.. lets go for our walk before the sun comes up." Octavia sighed and kissed his lips, "okay, lets go." 

 

|————————|

 

They made it out of camp and to the glowing plants before Lincolns lips crashed into Octavia's, pushing her up against a tree and unbuttoning her shirt he smiled. "I've been wanting to do this all week but we haven't been able to leave camp." — he said breaking the kiss. 

 

"Lincoln, shut up!" Before she knew it his hands were roaming under her shirt and his lips were at her neck. She moaned as he started to unhook her bra. Soon his shirt was gone and her hands were reaching for his belt knowing he needed them off because of the growing bulge she felt against her leg. He started helping her with her own jeans before he slid his hand into her underwear, rubbing his rough fingers against her heat, she moaned and her fingers dug into his back, "no teasing tonight, I need you not your hands." She pulled her pants off along with her underwear leaving herself fully exposed to him. He hummed as he tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear before his lips were back at her neck. He knew she loved it when he kissed her neck, he knew it sent shivers down her spine because her mouth parted in the sexiest way possible. 

 

She almost forgot about his underwear still being on till his hard on rubbed against her thigh again and she felt the thin fabric of his boxers. She stopped the kiss and grabbed the waist line of his boxers before tugging them down. She smirked and he moaned as his hard on slapped against his stomach. She took him in her hand and started to run her hands up and down him before he stopped her with her own words "no teasing"

 

He slowly lowered her onto the ground and started kissing her lips again, and rubbing his cock against her folds. 

 

"Lincoln please.." she said breaking the kiss. He didn't say anything else he just slowly entered her and they both groaned as he moved his hips. He pulled back, nearly coming all the way out before he roughly shoved back in. "Uh, your so tight." she couldn't bring herself to respond she just bit her lip to keep from moaning. "Faster" she moaned as she finally found a way to respond. He did as asked in went faster- bringing his tip nearly out as he slammed back in, hitting her g-spot. 

It wasn't long till they both came undone, cumming no more than ten minutes later. Lincoln rolled over and pulled Octavia on top of him, falling asleep.

 

|————————|

 

Octavia woke up the next morning still snuggled on Lincolns chest. She was happy until she realized where they were. She quickly jumped her and pulled her clothes on, throwing Lincolns shirt to him she woke him up. "Hurry up and get dressed. We have to get back to camp. Bellamy could already be awake and I'm not even there. I need to be there for him" 

"Calm down, it's barely seven-thirty. He's probably not awake" 

 

"Probably isn't in my brother's dictionary." 

 

Lincoln threw his shirt back on and they began walking back to camp, almost an hour later they finally got there. Lucky for Lincoln Bellamy wasn't fully away yet. And Octavia got there just in time to hold his hand as he woke up. 

 

"'Tavia?" She smiled and pushed his hair back, "yeah Bell, it's me. I'm here" he tried to sit up but her hands were at his shoulders before he could. "You can't here. Yo-you have to hide." Confusing struck Octavia as her brother continued "he's coming- you have to hide. If they find you they'll float you and mom" her heart was in her throats when she realized what was going on. He thought they were still on the ark. He thought they were still on that cage floating in the sky. "No Bellamy. I don't have to hide anymore. We're safe on the ground" a frown crept onto Bellamy face and he started crying, totally confused "no- we can't. It's not survivable. You have to hide. He's coming and if he sees you.. just please hide- you h-have to" 

 

"No, bell. He can't come because he's dead and we're safe on the ground. Nobody is coming and I don't have time hide. We're safe.."

 

"We're safe?.." she nodded, "yeah, we're safe." He looked around with his puffy eye and licked his chapped lips. "Where's mom?" Octavia hoped he wouldn't ask about their mother, she couldn't tell him the truth he'd freak out and hurt himself, "um. Bell.." 

 

"Where's mom? It hurts and I need her to— l- I need mom, please, I just want her to sing.." 

 

"Bell, I can't go get her." 

 

"Sh-she won't mad if you wake her up, I promise. She won't- she won't get mad. Just wake her up, please. I need mom." 

 

"She not asleep. She's.. she's working late tonight Bell, okay? She'll be here when you wake up. I promise." He looked up at his sister, his eyes closing as he sighed. "But I just want her to sing.. can, can you sing?"

 

"Bellamy, I- I only know the one song and I was little the last time she sang it to us..I don't remember the words- um."

"Please.." Bellamy got what he wanted when Clarke started humming on the other side of him, he turned his head slowly towards her and she ran her then over his check to wipe away the silent tears that had fallen down his cheeks "you've got a smile it seems to me  
Reminds me of childhood memories—" Bellamy closed his eyes as she started to sing and quietly listened, 

"–Where everything Was as fresh as the bright blue sky  
Now and then when I see your face  
You takes me away to that special place And if I'd stare too long  
I'd probably break down and cry  
Oh, oh, oh  
Sweet child o' mine  
Oh, oh, oh, oh  
Sweet love of mine" 

 

By the time she was done singing Bellamy was yet again, asleep. Not that anyone could blame him, sleeping was good, he couldn't hurt himself as much in his sleep.  



	7. Requests

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sorry I’ve been locked out of this account. Here’s a crappy chapter for ya.

Clarke sat there, her hands over her face. Trying not to fall asleep. Soon Abby was there. She placed a hand on Clarke’s shoulder, smiling. “Go get some sleep, I’ve got him.”

Clarke turned around slightly surprised to see her mom then she wordlessly stood up and hugged her mom, letting what she thought would only be a few tears.. finally fall. “I don’t know what to do mom, I can’t fix this.. I can’t stitch this up. He’s hardly stopped crying and now everyone knows what happened to him, he’ll be embarrassed. He’s never going to be the same.. I can feel it and I know I act like I hate him and sometimes I do but seeing him even more broken than mount weather ... seeing him up there begging, my heart broke for him.” Abby pushed Clarke back just enough so she could look at her, and put her hands on her daughter shoulders. 

“Sweetie, I know you don’t hate him, everyone does. Sometimes it takes something like this to show is how important someone is to us. He’s important to you, isn’t he?” 

“He is, he’s really important” Clarke replied

“Now the question is, does he know he’s important to you?” Abby asked “and is he important to you in more than a co-leader way.” 

Clarke thought about both of those things, why was she so upset? I mean there’s the fact that her and Bellamy were on the ground together for so long, and there was the fact that he had protected her several times, but maybe there was more. Maybe, cared for Bellamy more than she thought.. she couldn’t lie she had felt a certain way when he was around. Granted she never knew what exactly to make of that feeling but it was still there and she’d never felt it with anyone else. Had she ever thought of her and Bellamy in a more intimate way? Maybe but not for long because there was always some ‘big bad’ they had to worry about. Honestly she hasn’t really thought of herself in any type of relationship. 

“I’ve never really told him that, no. And I haven’t had time to think about how I feel, not in a long time, Mom..” 

 

“Well, it’s okay not to know, but I can tell you do care. Just make sure he knows. I realize I’ve never treated Bellamy too well but after seeing and hearing what I did .. seeing him like that, I can’t help but wonder what else he’s been through. I know he has to have ptsd from mount weather and that’s why the cell bothered him so much but from what Monty and Jasper said he was upset in the field .. the panic attack they described makes me think he has ptsd from something else as well.. something he was put though again, by those men.” 

Clarke looked confused at first then she finally got what her mom was trying not to say “you think he was raped before? Like on mount weather.” Her mom shook her head no, letting Clarke know that was exactly what she meant. “Wait.. on the ark?” Abby nodded “yes, Clarke. His mom sold herself to men to make what little money they had. Maybe one day she wasn’t what they wanted” 

“No. No, from what Bellamy and Octavia have told me their mom loved them more than anything.. she wouldn’t have let anyone do that to him. They were her world.” 

 

“Maybe she didn’t know.” 

 

“Ugh. I think I’m going to be sick..” Clarke sat down again leaning her head back against the wall, Abby tabbed her shoulder. “Clarke, get up, go get some sleep. I promise I got him.” 

Clarke reluctantly got up and gave her mom another hug, as she walked past Bellamy she gently ran her hand down his arm. “Night, Bell” 

 

 

When Bellamy woke up, he and Abby were the only ones in the med bay. He thought about closing his eyes and pretending he was asleep because Abby has never been his favorite person but he was thirsty and honestly didn't feel like being alone. 

although he had a pretty good idea as to where everyone went he asked anyway   
"Where is everybody?" 

 

Abby gave a half smile before replying,  
"if by everybody you mean your sister and Clarke, then they're either asleep or eating breakfast."

Bellamy sighed before relying. “Oh, okay.” He tried to sit up using his elbows because for some reason his wrists were killing him but Abby stepped forward getting closer and motioning him to lay back down, “just tell me what you need, you could pull your stitches.” He shifted a little uncomfortable with how close she was to him. “ mmm.. just a little thirsty” in no time Abby had a cup pressed to his lips, she helped him up far enough so he didn’t spill it on himself, but not far enough to pull his stitches. Bellamy’s eyes met hers for a second as she helped him lay back down. He was in more pain then he was before the shock lashes, a lot more but they were more than burns he just didn’t know what from. 

“What happened?” Bellamy asked looking at Abby once again. 

 

“What do you mean, do don’t remember what happened at all?” 

 

“I mean, why am I still sitting here. The shocks hurt like hell but why am I still in the med bay?”

 

“Well, when you passed out you broke your wrist. You were also exposed to a lot of electricity which caused some possible neurological damage.” 

“Wait, so m-my Brain is fried?” 

“No, Bellamy. Not like that. You had a seizure brought on by all the damage to your nerves and such. Plus you were already pretty weak. We’re just trying to keep an eye on you for the time being.”

“Oh.” Was his short response. Bellamy was scared, neurological damage? How could he be a soldier with that? How could he protect anyone like that? What about Octavia or Clarke. What about himself? Abby didn’t seem to act like she knew a whole lot about this what if there’s something else wrong as well? Is this going to mess with his speech, he just spoke with no problem but could one occur? His head was killing him, what if that never goes away? “Abby..” she to let him know she was paying attention to him. “M-my head.. my head hurts.” 

 

“Scale of one to ten?” 

 

“Seven..” he replied with a little unease scared to say it hurt too badly because he didn’t want to earn any extra time here, even though his tent was small and cramped it was his and he was comfortable there. He ended up answering truthfully though. As much as he missed his bed- cot technically.. he didn’t want to risk fucking his head up any worse. 

Abby walked over grabbing an IV and needle, she pulled Bellamy’s arm gently, “ball your fist up for me, this will work faster than any pills I can give you. It’ll knock you out as well.” Bellamy sighed. He didn’t want to keep sleeping days away. He felt useless sitting there. “What’s the matter, Bellamy?” Abby asked.

“I don’t want to waste my days.” 

 

“Well I can give you a few pain killers and we can wait it out or... you can let me give you this and you can sleep for a few hours while everyone else does as well and when you wake up you’ll actually be rested. Hate to break it to you but from what everyone says you’ve been sleeping yet haven’t been resting. And you won’t get any closer to being out of here unless you actually rest.” 

Bellamy sighed again before nodding, “go ahead.” He said reluctantly. 

Abby inserted the IV and pulled a blanket over Bellamy. “It’s going to be cold today.” Bellamy have her a small smile to say thank you. 

Bellamy could feel himself falling asleep so he quickly mumbled something to Abby “C-Clarke, when I..” Abby looked puzzled for a second but caught hold of what he was trying to say. “You want Clarke when you wake up?” 

“Mm.” Bellamy nodded before falling asleep. Actually resting in God knows how long.


End file.
